alienwear | Dumbshit urban fantasy AU

Dumbshit urban fantasy AU

Lapis is an ancient vampire from the bronze age who really hates not being allowed to eat humans anymore.

Jasper is a former monster hunter turned vampire by Lapis out of spite.

Peridot is a transgender lesbian polyamorous werewolf who just wants her girlfriends to get along.

There's gonna be porn in the comments.

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"We can just move if it bothers you that much," Peridot points out, following up after an appreciative hiss that comes from her dick being freed from Pants Prison. "You don't need to take it out on my chair, which is perfectly comfortable and serviceable for most situations.

"It's a glorified dog bed. And also horrible for your posture." What with all the slumping and crunching, but obviously it bothers Lapis less than she makes it seem, because she's already ducking her head to wrap her lips around Peridot's dick.

Peridot gasps with offense at the words "dog bed", but Lapis's warm mouth around her cock makes for a pretty solid distraction. She lets her head fall back with a hiss, wagging her tail enthusiastically and pushing her hips upwards to meet that contact.

It's a plus that Lapis, being as undead as she is, doesn't actually need to breathe. It helps with the whole sucking dick thing, even if she doesn't appreciate the motion that Peridot's hips make.

So she deals with it, arm slinging over said offending hips as she sucks, controls the pace with a practiced ease that quite frankly is far too relaxed for what she knows Peridot wants her to do.

"You know," She says, pulling her mouth free from Peridot's cock at probably the worst time. "You're lucky I just bit you. Otherwise you'd be getting a cold fish blowjob."

Peridot keeps swearing under her breath and muttering Lapis's name, pent up energy from her desire to buck making her whole lower half extra tense. The thought crosses her mind that she wants to get her fingers in the vampire's hair, but JUST WHEN THINGS ARE GETTING GOOD, Lapis pulls away.

"Then I wouldn't be getting a blowjob at all," Peridot points out in a strained voice. You know. Because getting touched by something that cold would make her dick run and hide?

"Aw, come on. Surely my skill makes up for my lack of warmth." Lapis says, licking a stripe up Peridot's cock. "Though I guess you wouldn't be horny if I hadn't bit you in the first place, huh." Or maybe she would, in this hypothetical scenario that Lapis chooses to end by going back down on her with a very, very, purposefully, lewd noise.

Peridot swears just a little louder this time.

"It's not just the biting," she groans, trying to sound defensive and failing. "It's that trance. It does weird things to my body chemistry... Shit!"

This time, she does tangle her claws in Lapis's hair, her other hand digging into the surface of the beanbag chair. A gentle suggestion for Lapis to keep her head down and keep at it, until Peridot finally blows her load.

She pushes down, just a little more forcefully against Peridot's hips, trapping them more succinctly underneath her as she sucks, groans softly around a mouth full of dick as claws tangle in her hair in the most pleasant of ways.

Let no one say that Lapis Lazuli isn't easy to please, even when she's going down on someone.

That groan is music to her fuzzy ears. Each suck brings Peridot closer and closer to the brink, her breaths growing tighter and shallower as her arousal builds. Taking in her whole length might begin to prove challenging, as the werewolf's sensitive knot bulges out; the brush of the vampire's lips against it is making her grow ever more dizzy with pleasure, and she can barely stand it.Subconsciously, the fingers in Lapis's hair tense, until their hold borders just on the edge of painful...

"Lapis," Peridot moans desperately after a minute of this, this time with a particular note of warning in her tone. She wants to give her ample warning to pull away. Just in case Lapis doesn't feel like swallowing a bunch of werewolf spunk on top of all the blood she just drank.

Yeah, turns out she super doesn't, and she pulls her head back to finish Peridot off with her hand. Look, she only gets to infrequently feed off of Peridot, and she's not about to ruin a good meal by swallowing werewolf jizz.

At least her hands are warm! There's that, at least.

It would be pretty tragic for poor Peridot if they weren't.

It doesn't take much to finish her off after that, even though she much prefers Lapis's mouth to her hands. As she nears her peak, Peridot involuntarily lets out a soft, gurgling whine, which builds in volume and intensity until she finally cums, jizz spattering about indiscriminately.

She lets her head fall back and awoos when this happens, shuddering exultantly against the arm Lapis has her pinned with.

"That is the cutest shit." Lapis says, in reference to the 'awoo'. But also, she's wiping her hand on Peridot's pants, because she definitely doesn't feel like having werewolf cum on her today? It's just not in her cards.

"Hope your mic was up for that." Otherwise all of Peridot's online friends absolutely just heard her getting blown like fine glass.

Peridot sits up abruptly, at first because Lapis just wiped jizz on her pants and she's mad about it, and then because she has to check the TV in a panic.

"The game system isn't even on anymore," she huffs, half smug that she managed to outsmart Lapis about this, and half relieved that her online friends did not, in fact, hear any of that.

"Lucky." She says, not even remotely caring about the fact that Peridot has outsmarted her, because quite frankly she's not even remotely concerned about how technology works and she will never care! Technology is bad and Thomas Edison was probably a witch!

"Anyway, thanks for the food."

"Yup," Peridot replies, sounding a vaguely cross. She's preoccupied with trying to shuffle out of her jizz smeared pants now. How could you do this to her, Lapis????

Easily. And this is not the first nor the last time that she'll wipe a jizz smeared hand against Peridot's nice clothes.

Also like, she's just watching and not doing anything remotely helpful.

That's fine. This is fine. Peridot eventually succeeds and hoists herself to her feet, standing there in her boxers and looking sort of woozy.

"Think 'm gonna go get some juice or somethin," she mumbles, and wobbles towards the kitchen.

"Have fun." Lapis says, like an absolute tool, because when Peridot gets up and wavers and wobbles, she reacts by stealing Peridots awful bean bag chair that gives the same awful noise that is kind of a boner kill as she sits in it.

Why does she put up with this? Who knows.

Lapis gives incredible blow jobs. That's why she puts up with it, and that's the only reason.

She grunts in reply, and disappears to go drink directly from the orange juice carton and slam down a bunch of beef jerky.

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Dumbshit urban fantasy AU

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